Chapter 10: Coming Soon

wa.......... DF Grad Day is just around the corner, and this Saturday is the final rehearsal day. Oh man, two feelings i would like to describe myself: Excited and in the same time, i'm nervous....

Excited
haha, of course i'm excited, seeing peeps around performing what they've learned. Piano class is having a bloom this time, the most number of performance. The students in there are like pro to me, thus they can perform so many songs in a time. I bet they went searching scores for nice songs and practice in it; another thing is they also posses the passion of learning. Well, i salute them, haha....all the best..

Nervous
haha, besides nervous, i'm scared too..... This is because........i'm MC..... Haha. Wonder why i'm so afraid to become one of the MC of the day, though they are still 3 more frens accompanying me, erm.....maybe i've stage fright? nah...not that..hmm...wonder why.... Indeed i really really hope that, really really hope that........ they will say:

                  "Jason ar, enough MC liao la, you're exempted..."

hahahahahahahah!!!!

........just another qustion....

My dad once asked me a question:

One day a Jack and Jane went driving on the beach. Jack was driving and Jane was sitting beside him. As Jack was driving he looked at the rear mirror to look behind of the car but he can’t find any car tracks on the beach, why? 

Can you figure out? The answer, was a logic one. I was stunned when he told me that only street-wise people will know the answer while book-smart people can’t figure out the answer. At first I was quite angry coz he seemed to ‘chuan” me that I’m not wise enough. Initially I was furious, but then when I think again, it was nothing to be angry about because what he said, was quite true too. Well, I just finished STPM and started working not long. Many of times we study and study, books and books, exercises and exercises, why? In order to score good marks in exams. But little did we know that we had neglected about common knowledge in our normal life. Well, for me it was true that I really neglected the general knowledge that I should also pursue and I was spending most of the time doing exercises from reference books and not spending more time reading magazine or newspaper that it’s regarding to our normal life. “Sigh”, I knew in the eyes of dad I’m only a small kid who doesn’t know anything, and he always compare me with him during his young age. Well, maybe I’m that weak, maybe I’m that useless, maybe I really don’t know anything, but…..as far as I know, if one is willing to learn and not give up in learning, he or she deserve a second chance. Hmm, probably that’s a little self-encouragement for myself, though…Ha-ha!!! 

Back to the question, u guys wanna know the answer? Or u had already known it? Well, the answer……is………Jack was reversing his car. Ha-ha!! Got it? Yes? Huh, no? Noob? Ha-ha!! Just joking…… Jack was reversing his car and looking at the rear mirror, of course he can’t see any tracks because the car was moving backwards, the tracks are in front of the car not behind the car………………Got it? Street-wise? Book-smart? Ha-ha…..

Chapter 9: Looking Beyond the Troubles

Walau!! (an expression used by some Chinese), busy Saturday again, and this time its worst….

I need to let my class perform a song, the guitar class, thought I had time to brief them and practice with them. But, I was wrong……..

When I reached church, the room usually for my class is being used by choir class. Feeling frustrated I went searching high and low for an empty room for my class. Guess what, non of the rooms were empty, and I end up teaching guitar at hall, with drum class and piano class. Haiz, is my class so being deserted? It was so noisy that no one could listen to what I am teaching. It was 4:15pm where I started teaching.
(class starts at 4pm)………………..


Then, comes another issue…… She came and told me ps meng’s sermon having error, typo error…Well, due to the different versions of software, I had to edit it in my com and send it back to ps, by email, and I did it during…….my class. I had to leave my class halfway with students having “?” in their heads. I ran up, edit and send it…. That file was damn long, 7mb. Sending it it’s like taking ages. Well, 4:30pm, I came down and continue my class. Later someone came and ask me for the transit key, haiz, I left my class again. Luckily this took me 5 minutes. But, before I can continue to teach my class, she came and says ps is leaving but he hasn’t got his sermon. Man, what the heck is happening, I went up, took my pendrive and save that sermon for ps. Haiz, if only that person had checked that sermon properly, I wouldn’t suffer this much, why must everything has to be me who bear all others responsibility…..


Finally, 4:40pm, I continued my class. Firstly I thought of practicing the graduation song performance, but then came 2 new learners, oh man!!! How am I gonna teach, I can’t split myself, nor I have that much time to teach…… My mind was in a mess… I was thinking why no one would help me when I’m needed, where’s everyone, why others have to be so free while I’m the one running here and there like a mad cow…. Who knows… Haiz…… I’m so frustrated….. Grasping for air……. First I hate the person who typed the sermon wrongly, then i was angry why no one helped me……. And night came, those people left, for entertainment, and left the undone job, for me alone……Haiz…..

“Who can understand the will of God, who can know the plans of God,” this was what pastor chomy shared on Sunday sermon. God has His beautiful will behind every bad thing that happens, and its just a test whether we can rely on Him when facing troubles.

Despite the troubles happened, God has His beautiful will behind all troubles. My cell members turned up unexpectedly, miracle though, and cell group was fun, everyone enjoyed, DF members turned out a lot too… I guess God was watching me all over from the beginning, and had this good plan for me, hmm….. guess those troubles I faced was worth the price…… and……I was a fool to be devour by anger and frustration, I should be calm and knowing God was testing my Patience… I should look beyond…

Hatred from Saturday was still in me during Sunday service, well of course people can’t notice because my “mask-of-feeling” was a success, but then the Holy Spirit, spoke to me when the 1st worship song was sang, “you need to forgive”, this was what it said…… I, was down with tears at the moment. Guess I ought to forgive though this hatred kept turning in my heart. Well, at first I cant let it go, the hate was so deep, but still…..hmm……. God moved me and I let it go…..

That day pastor chomy shared about having a good foundation a Christian. Job, was shared as one of the examples, I looked at the story and looked at myself, and found that God had bless me though…. I should looked beyond my troubles…………………………………………….

Chapter 8: Bowling-Outing

Heh heh~~ Went bowling that Friday, quite enjoying…….especially those young ones…… Played 2 rounds, haha….. those small ones were so tired….. erm, though they don’t know much how to play, but still, they came out with some pretty cool techniques and post….haha

haha, this fellow is kinda cool all the way when we started playing till the end, well, cool guy had cool actions too….:)

er…….mm……..no comment……haha

Terence is some experienced player compared to the other 3…… Despite Wei Jie, he laugh all the way through from start till end…

whoa ha…… this person, man….. geng….. Firstly he got 1 or 2 pins, then when he saw a player next lane using this post while playing, he copied it and use for himself, guess what, he got 6-7 pins in a row!! Strike once…..:p

this…….ben la…..haha……cool style, but sometimes goes into the drain….

this…….me lo…. Played 2 rounds and ended up swelling my hand…..


Well, seeing them happy made me glad too…. Happy that this outing turned out to be good, felt that we’re much closer now…. Hope that we can have more opportunity to hang out more…

~this is us~ ^^

Chapter 7: Another Day with God

Its Monday again, I was on my day off, and I did my devotion using the info given in the church bulletin. Every week we were given devotion aide info for us to do devotion and also discipleship using the characters in bible. Today I did devotion using the character Adam. Adam was the first man God created and He gave him authorities in the Garden of Eden. But men sin against God, and Adam push the responsibility to Eve claiming that Eve gave him the fruit to eat. Hence from here we can learn that Adam flee from responsibility he has to bear, searching for excuses to hide himself from guilt. Using these materials I prayed that I won’t follow the footsteps of Adam. I prayed and I worshiped alone, in my room. The presence of God was strong, as I gave thanks and I was moved and touched by the spirit of God.  Besides this I was very thankful for my cell as I can see some fruits bearing. Well, apparently I gave yi liang and his younger sister chee woon to lead ice breaker in my cell. Miraculously, they enjoyed it and it turned up very good. They take this responsibility seriously. Well, those two brothers and sister were very weak in their confidence, I used to encourage them to brace themselves but it was useless, and of course I blamed myself coz I can’t train them well. But, I rely on God and asked Him to lead me. Yeah, and that’s it!! God raise them up slowly, and I believe they can do much bigger things for God. May God continue to bless them…Amen…..

Chapter 6: sUnD@y

I met this new brother in church, Jacob is his name. He’s a good bro, kind, and man, I like his smile^^. He’s the bro that is going help me on maintaining the church website. We had a chat while we first met. We talked about web thingy and career. From him I got to know lucky I am. This is because I work in church where many were my close friends and seniors, hence sometimes when I made a mistake they will cover for me. In the outside world, you won’t receive this good treatment. The expectations of employers are much higher, let’s say if you want to have a salary as high as 3k/month, you need to work with a higher capacity as 10k/month. I was kinda shock when I heard Jacob told me this, well, although I’m still not in the outside world (yet), I ought to know more to boost myself.

The night was moody, I, apparently had an argument with, sis….. I bolted her with anger coz of her attitude (I think she didn’t notice about I’m kinda heated). Here and there I kept arguing and we went to the topic of…… “Hiding”. Well, maybe I’m a straight person, or maybe I don’t understand girls that much, but still I dislike people hiding from me. Perhaps she is wanting me to think about it myself logically and not giving the answer straight away, but, my logic thinking is not that……..strong anyway. I replied here and there, trying to dig out information, but I ended up getting nothing. Maybe the methodology was wrong, or, I’m too weak? Still, different people have different kind of characteristics, and……I need to understand more and deeper about what those are… Perhaps the longer I hang on to them I can understand more. Hope time is still there for me to search the answer…………………………

Chapter 5: Busy Satur-day

The second week of my days working in church has come to an end, it was Friday, where I went back last, again. Saturday was a real of a hectic day for me. From 9am, I work non-stop till 11pm. I went church,  taught Mannee and Yuan Qing guitar. Man, he was a fast learner, its been a long time since I met this kind of person, a person who is willing to learn, and hence, I put my trust in him, trusting him will become a good guitarist and a vessel of God.

After the class v had meeting to plan about Dream Factory events, and lunch after the meeting. I think lunch time is the only time I had some rest. Then, of to church again for prayer. It was 2pm when we started prayer, it ended at 3pm where I went straight to fetch people from sg buloh. Oh man, thank God for once coz’ the transit I drove had an “E” on the petrol meter, while God prevent the meter from goin down….pooh! When I reached back church, I went to…….teach guitar again. After that we had cell and after cell I fetch those people back again. It was a tiring day for me when everything ends at 7:30pm where I headed back to church for practice. Praise the Lord, coz’ in Him I gained strength to continue serving.

Chapter 4 Day At School

Its 4th of January, and most scholars started classes today. I went to school, with my classmates too........well, not to study…..heh heh

I overslept, probably I watched too much Bleach yesterday, which made me having insufficient sleep. Luckily I wasn’t the one late, another classmate, probably the organizer, was late too…haha…. That girl is always the late comer, as I know……haha

We went to see our teachers  and some juniors, thought of selling some old books but it didn’t turned out well….. After that, we went for our living certs, again it didn’t turned out well……our formal form teacher had left the certs at home…=.=” what a bummer……

At 11, we went Curve for sing-k…. only 4 of us, ben, yin, mei and of course....me...heh heh...

we sang some old songs, though i dunno what song is it, think is mei who chose it....

and some even old songs......hmm.....

Chapter 3: Retreat, Rejuvenate, Refresh and Restart

Day Bright
It was the first day of 2010, where most people would be spending time with their families and friends, while I…..was tired….. I slept at 3am, playing couple of games using mahjong tiles and a can of Tiger to go with; not only that, we….. “boil” movies too…….well actually its not movie lar, is anime lar….=.=”

 Actually church organized a leaders’ retreat (2days 1 night), where most leaders will be going up to Genting to pray with pastor. Today is our turn, all the youth leaders with their disciples are going to that place to pray. Everyone gathered at church and we left at 11:45, I think……..

We stopped by at Genting Sempah for lunch at McD. The weather there was quite cold, you can feel the cool breeze blowing. At 1pm, we headed to Genting View Resort. We didn’t actually put up a night in GVR, we just stayed at a villa nearby. It was quite cold , colder than the previous year, hence jacket is needed. Well I brought mine, a very thick and costly one, and…….it looks like those jacket where motorist wear when they ride their bike. People see me will say, “hey goin a ride?”…….oh well, its still a jacket…..

The dorm, was………quite perfect. Double decked beds with 4 in 1 toilet. 4 heaters, wow, amazing…. But only 2 are usable. I tested the 1st one, without knowing the pipe was damaged, I turn on the shower quickly and water splashed all over my shirt and pants, wet………. The 2nd shower was good, but the 3rd, I remembered my mistake, not to turn so fast, but without knowing the temperature was set to the max, the hot boiling water splashed me and guess what, I’m toast-(ed)!!....(groan)……

Outside the dorm.....

The purpose of this trip is to have a relax mind and seek god for His words. Seek god for His words, but I forgot to bring my bible….:( what a bummer…. At 2pm we started praying individually, everyone was “scattered” around the villa (there were 32 of us……I think, haha), while I was on the top of the villa, praying. At the first 45mins, I was……….not concentrating on my prayers. My mind flew here and there, and my eyes kept looking left and right. When I was about to concentrate, I saw two person walking here and there and sitting down under a tree talking, so I stand behind the pillar that will block my vision of the two person, and started concentrating on prayers. Not long later, the wind blew so hard that the door beside me gave a loud “thud!”. I was shock, apparently……oh man!! How can I concentrate??!! Thank God, the prayer time lasted 2 hours; I was back on track after an hour.

Twilight
After dinner we discussed about Dream Factory. Many suggestions, many opinions, and……many things to do. Everyone was united, and came up to a conclusion, so as the ICU’s. I guess this trip up here is worth the time, though….

Morning (2nd day)
We had bible study. Poor me, I left my bible, (sigh)…… But still, I managed to share with Ben, and we read together. Both of us have the same feeling together, perhaps this is where they called “spirit unity”, where we both felt……………..boring….hahahaha!!! well, looking at the bible in the early morning plus the cool weather sure made us feel like dozing…..But then I managed to stay alert for God’s word, where I came across Proverbs 3:5 where it says not to rely on our own strength but to rely on God and He will guide you. It is true I always rely on myself, maybe because I don’t trust people much. For the past few years I had experienced the total disappointment of trust, which makes me can’t trust people anymore. I hate to rely on people, especially on school assignments and projects. I always wanted to do it myself where others did in groups. I feel that group members will be the chain metal ball tied on my legs. I always think that I can do this and that, with my own strength. I fell, and I climb up myself, even in my studies, I rely on my own strength, which makes me ended up in fatigue, failure and frustration. Is this a life of a Christian? Many of times God has given me chances and opportunity to rely on Him, I just let it go. But I prayed this time with this bible verse, it gave me a confirmation that if I rely on God and not my own strength, I can go further, and this is what I’ve got from this retreat, to rejuvenate myself from the scars from the past, and to refresh for the new year….