Chapter 36: Parrots...

Parrots....are noisy...... If you've seen one, you'll know the characteristics of it. Well, sad to say, I...have one in my class.

      Today as I was attending the tutorial class, we had a test. After that, we had a slight discussion on our forum topic. It's when this parrot came in and sat down with the first line: "Can i join ur group ar?". Feeling reluctantly, i replied with a "dunno, ask them" and pointing to the rest of my group mates. Well, they agreed.

     Guess what, this parrot kept babbling and babbling about joining this activity, going that meeting, kinda like disturbing our discussion, and won't stop. This parrot, was a female chinese coursemate. Oh man, the whole entire discussion she was like "come join la jason, join this la join that la, you know those ppl will scold us if we din ask ppl to join ar..". Later on things getting worst, her hands!, my goodness.....came touching and rubbing my hand. MY GOD! What the hell is this? Molest? Abuse? "Wei, i'm not ur hubby lar, pls respect" i thought, but i din say it out. I kept quiet, remained silent, and read my book while thinking about my discussion topic. Then this parrot (she) went to ask those malay fren (groupmates) who are also in the midst of brainstorming for points. She asked and asked plus making "unnecessarily noises" over the table.

For once, i can confirm that...
1. She's noisy.
2. She's not helping.
3. She's too over.
4, She's not respecting me.

And i feel that.......................I wanna give her a HIGH 5.....RIGHT ONTO HER FACE......It pisses me off!

I don know why, these people (not only her, there's more), they're like...hmm.... I dunno what words to describe...(fanatics probably?)......in promoting their society. And what's worst is......They're chinese, they're my kind. To me their "throwing our kind's face" (diu sai tong yan geh ga in cantonese). Why on earth are you guys so.......hmm....i dunno.... You see, you're expecting me to join your society, but all the while you don have a good study attitude, and u kept saying that if i don join they will scold. From this you've already baffled out all the negative things about your....stuffs....How would u expect me to join?

Heh, guess what, i'm suspecting something too.... I'm just wondering are you (the parrot, she) treating me so good all the while just to pull me into ur society? hmph....

Chapter 35: Cuck-koo...

hah, kinda free now...a bit.. While waiting for ma mates to complete da assignment....ha, speaking of assignment, lecturer told us a shocking news to us, "Tomorrow is your presentations". Everyone paused, it seemed like time stopper had stop the time. Everyone was astonished with "!" on their face, or perhaps a "?" for some. For me, i'm "!?".......haha.....

Everything was unprepared, unorganized. Everyone did everything in the last minute. Well, I just finished my nightmare of pengantar sains sosial presentation. Today, was a very......good day. The head of lecturer came and watch our presentation. And guess what, when i was presenting she say, "ini konsep salah, wrong concept". Indirectly, it means, wrong presentation lo..... Sigh... But never mind, compare to my other mates, she actually praise me for my points....Haha...

So now, preparing tomorrow's presentation. Pooh, one after another. Monday is another presentation again..=.=... Think i'm goin cuckoo d for these days. 

Chapter 34: 又累，又泪

这几天，真的好累，真的好累。不晓得为什么，我显得那么忙，而别人显得那么轻松。同一样的一科，同样的一班，可是为什么感觉上，我比他们累。几乎，我走的路，好像比较远。他们走一步，我可能要走三四步。

相处了那么久，你们还是这一个样子。办事能力，唉。责任，唉。感觉上我好像在背着你们的责任。你们的心，到底去了哪里... 遇到不同的环境，“oh man jason i think this is too new for me, this is so different from form 6 life"，当然啦，不过为何不尝试去改变。整天那个样子，唉。还有，"jason, i think this is too much for me," 唉，去改变咯。还有一个，“jason, ini tak boleh la, itu tak boleh la." 若你是男的，我觉得，我会给你一个high 5 在你的脸上。唉，真是受不了。为何又不听你说“jason, lets solve this together, i think this this will be better" ，唉。

这一科，以马来文教，可是参考书是英文，真是令人感到好奇。明明是英国人的历史，可是所教的语文是马来文。做么酱叻，哦，因为有很多马............听到这一点，心里又不耐烦了。现在，又有presentation, 以马来文表达。奇怪，我是英文科，怎么用马来文表达，甚至用英文会被扣分。炸到....

....................刚流了几滴的泪水，好累，也好多的泪，也在呼求神。我深深感觉到，这是神的考验。不晓得，祂想对我说些什么.....

其实，我真的很想，如果，有，一些同族的朋友，可以在我身旁，帮助我。至少，给我的感觉，我不是一个人在做，乃是我们一起做。目前，眼前只能对着这一班性马的人，说到这里，我只能以“唉”这个字来结束.....

唉...............................................

Chapter 33: + & -

Lately I’m just negative, I wonder what had happen to me. Hmm… Seems that I have no mood to do everything. I just wanna ignore everything, escape everything and just…hmm…
hmm…hide? Probably yes. Even my school stuffs I would have this intention to hide from it, to run away from it, and now I’ve piles of things undone….Crap….

Friday, 17th of September, is my cell’s school’s Mid-Autumn Party. All plans were last minute decision and even though the day has come and I’m still in a blur case… Frankly, I admit, I didn’t put any effort to run nor help my mates in this party. I just don’t know why this, will happen to me. As if I was not me, I’ve no heart for things, just, felt like ignoring everything. Well, mid autumn party, yeah, it was a party, till before the day, sis mei lin came and approach me and challenge me to do an altar call. “Pooh SHIT!! What?!” (I was thinking that time). So unprepared, so last minute, made me almost sleepless night and “mood-less” to do everything. Goodness me, heart attack…=.=” Asking the wrong person to do wrong thing at wrong situation. Perhaps she doesn’t understand though, hmm… Well, asking me to share something is already gonna take me a lifetime to prepare, 更何况is altar call…. Haha…. I’ve been thinking shit.. Haha… Anyway, in this last minute case, the presence of God and Holy Spirit is important. Ask me how are you gonna do the altar call now (17/9/2010, 10:15am), i…..have no idea… I’m just….haha…tense…

Hmm…..lets share something positive now, those (up) were the negative thoughts. Yeah, youth camp, it was awesome. Seeing our CC experiencing miracles and miracles makes me wanna give all the glory to Him. Though I was not in the management team, I don’t know what actually happen, till that night, 2nd night, he shared the miracles to me, and I was astonished. Wow, I didn’t knew that you guys are facing troubles along the way, coz’ the camp all around, was good, and awesome, seeing so many youth throwing out themselves with confidence and talents, plus developed their leadership skills. Haha… Although everyone was tired siao that 3 days, hot and sweat till crazy that day, but I believe that they enjoyed.

Personally, I think that serving in youth ministry, is still valuable. And this value, is eternal, coz’ we’re building lives, do you amen? Hah….

Chapter 33: Problem vs Solution

He who faces problem,
he runs, he hides, he escapes,
runs from the situation,
hides from people,
and escapes responsibility.
Irresponsible person, shun him

He who faces problem,
he worries, he panics, he struggles,
worry about himself,
panic in the situation,
and struggling to solve the problem.
He's in need, help him.

He who faces problem,

he's blur, he's lost, he doesn't know, 

blur about what's happening,

lost in the situation,

and doesn't know he's facing a problem.

He's asleep, wake him.

He who faces problem,

he knows, he tries, but failed,

knows that there's a problem,

tries to solve it,

but failed.

He's trying, teach him.

He who faces problem,

he's positive, he finds solutions, and solved,

positive towards what he's facing,

finds ways to solve the situation,

and successfully solved the problem.

He's wise, follow him.

There're many people in the world, having different kinds of attitude when they face challenges and problems, some good some bad. The best attitude when facing problems is......solve em......tat's all....don hide....